Friday, May 11, 2012

Growing pains

The past two weeks have seen a lot of growth, both literally and figuratively... In the literal sense, my belly seems to be expanding at an exponential rate these days and it is getting more difficult to exercise. I can still walk long distances, but I have to slow my pace so I don't get cramps now. My back has been a little sore, but I think it's only because I'm carrying extra weight- hopefully the yoga I started will help with that. It's also strange that I can't see my feet anymore when I look down! In order to see them I have to lean over. But it's all worth it! I have also been craving ice cream a lot! If it was possible to eat a tub of ice cream every night, I absolutely would.

21 weeks
Yesterday morning I had my 21 week ultrasound and little Bambino has been growing a lot! According to the measurements, Bambino is now 469 kg (a little over a pound), and everything looks good :) He/she has all 10 toes, 10 fingers, a working heart, stomach, kidneys, etc. It was fun to see everything again and be reassured that Bambino is healthy. They also printed some pictures for us to keep (I love that part). We stayed strong in not finding out the gender of the baby, but as Josh said "it's hard not to ask if it's a boy or girl when the doctor tells you to look away from the screen!"

Queens Day, April 2012, Amsterdam
On another note, the last week or so has also given me a lot of room for growth mentally and in my relationship with Josh. After leaving Amsterdam I was not feeling very good because I over did it with the walking. After returning to Milan I was unable to walk very much without cramping and I was just exhausted. Unfortunately, Josh didn't leave Amsterdam with me to go home to Milan, he followed a day and a half later after a work meeting in London. He didn't get to see the initial shock that my body went through, and I failed to talk to him about it. He was frustrated when things weren't getting done, and I was frustrated that he didn't understand that I needed rest and recuperation. All I wanted was to heal so I could get back to the daily grind without getting crampy. It was a mistake not to openly communicate how I was feeling with him and it created some tense moments for us last week. I'm learning that even though he can't go through what I am experiencing, he should at least get a chance to know what I'm going through. I have to be more open about the changes going on each week with my body/emotions and allow him a chance to respond to that. It wasn't fair that I kept him in the dark about that, and then got frustrated when he didn't understand.

July 2011 in Rome
These moments crate an opportunity for growth between us and it is bringing us closer together in the end. I just need to be open and trust that he will do his best to understand. After all, he is the main person I can really rely on in Italy. I love you Josh!!

PS. I have posts pending for our Amsterdam trip... coming soon...  they are just waiting for pictures to be edited.

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